


Of the Night

by sevansa



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: Angst Lite, Edward Elric Swears, Edward Elric needs a hug, Gen, If You Squint - Freeform, Late night talks, Pre-Slash, Roy is a good person, al knows everything, hug that kid, seriously
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-22
Updated: 2018-04-22
Packaged: 2019-04-26 02:12:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,056
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14392068
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sevansa/pseuds/sevansa
Summary: Sometimes, a late night conversation is all you need to feel whole again.ORThe one where Edward angsts, Roy helps, and Al lives to worry about his brother and his virtue.





	Of the Night

In his spare time, he writes.

He keeps a little notebook with him all the time, and when he finds something he could make a potential use of, he notes it down.

He writes things he hopes he’d never have a cause to implement. He writes a list of Last Resorts; incase all their research turns out to be for naught.

Some of the things he writes are flights of fantasy. Nothing that could in anyway be proven to work. Others, are so detailed and are often very likely to work- Except, it’s always with a much too high a cost.

Once, when it seemed especially hopeless, He calculated the exact number of human souls it would take to create a stone strong enough to bring Al’s body back- Too many. Was the answer.

Some nights, the numbers seemed hilariously small. others, just looking at it turned his stomach.

It was one such night that found Edward Elric lurking around the military headquarters. How did he end up here, was a mystery even to him.

But it was cold and he was angry, and he didn’t feel like going back to the dorms where Al would be forced to deal with his contrary ass.

They’d just hit another block and Ed was _angry_ , a burning, senseless, aimless, anger that was quickly evolving and straying into forbidden territory.

So, he grabbed his red coat and whirled around answering Al’s startled question with an abrupt “out.” He’ll spare the energy to feel guilty about that later.

Al, bless him, knew when his brother needed some time to cool off.

So, Ed wanders, walking through familiar streets, his mind whirling with terrible thoughts. Terrible, in how easy they would be to actually commit. But he already had experience in how playing god goes… and he’s not eager to see a repeat performance of that.

He’s startled to find himself in front of the ornate gates. Ed stands, hands deep in his pockets, trying to preserve what little warmth there is, unsure what to do.

He must have been truly out of it, because the next thing he knows a hand is falling on his shoulder and he’s whirling around, automail arm instinctively balling and aiming a fist at his assailant.

There’s an undignified yelp, but the assailant dodges and Ed finally registers who it was.

“Colonel!” Ed says, surprised, automail arm falling down apologetically.

“A bit high-strung, aren’t we? Fullmetal.” The colonel says sardonically.

Ed scowls at him. “’S your fault, what are you doing out anyway?” Ed asks, shuffling his feet, trying to keep the warmth going.

The colonel raises an eyebrow, giving him a weird look. “Shouldn’t _I_ be the one to ask this Fullmetal?”

Ed’s scowl deepens. “Fuck off, I was just taking a walk.”

“At- “he pauses, making a show of consulting his watch. “-two in the morning?”

“Your point?”

“It’s freezing, Fullmetal. Go back to you brother.” The colonel says tiredly.

And now that Ed’s looking, its obvious that the Colonel is exhausted, he’s wrapped in a snug looking coat, and even in the dim light he could see the creases between his eyebrows as if he’s fighting an oncoming headache. Hell, even his hair looks droopy.

“Don’t wanna.” He says stubbornly, though. “You go home Colonel, see ya.”

Ed says and is just turning to leave when the Colonel says, “Well, come along then.”

“Come where?” Ed asks, thrown.

Mustang makes a show of his exasperation as if _Edward_ was the slow one.

“With me,” and if the Colonel was any less dignified, he would probably add a duh “- I could hardly in good conscious leave you out to freeze all night.”

Ed glowers at him. “I’m not going to your house.” He says, almost scandalized.

Mustang -the insufferable bastard- smirks “Why Fullmetal? Afraid for your virtue?”

Edward splutters and could feel his cheeks betraying him. “Fuck off, bastard, I could kick your ass if I want to!” He screeches at the older man.

“Well, then there no reason for you to refuse, is there?” Mustang says, with a casual shrug.

Ed opens his mouth to argue- but, well, he really didn’t feel like going back to the dorms, the small room was stifling enough, and well, his thoughts weren’t any better with the direction they were careening towards.

The thought of company, even one as insufferable as the bastard’s was… reassuring. At least with Mustang, he didn’t feel like an open book, the way he felt around his brother.

So he lets his shoulders slump, and jerks his head in a nod, staring at the floor, and oh, when did it start snowing?

He can feel the Colonel’s heavy gaze on him, but he says nothing and Edward refuses to meet his gaze.

They make their silent way towards the Colonel’s place.

It ends up being a narrow brown townhouse with a charming slanted ceiling, and the pang of want that courses through him is both intense and surprising.

“Fullmetal?” The Colonel says, something unidentifiable in his tone.

Edward jerks and realizes he’s stopped before the steps, the bastard already has the door open. Edward hurries through the foyer.

He doesn’t take off his coat, but toes his boots off haphazardly, while the colonel carefully hangs his own coat and lines up his boots in precise angles. Ed stands there awkwardly, unsure. Now that he’s out of the snow, his body finally starts to register how cold it was and a violent shiver wracks its way through his spine. The colonel, obviously, notices.

“Come, I’ll light a fire.”

“Fire.” Ed agrees enthusiastically.

The colonel’s lips twitch, as if fighting a smile.

Somehow, Ed ends up on one of the most comfortable sofas he’s ever had the pleasure of sitting on, with a roaring fire in front of him and a cup of cocoa in hand.

He squints at the drink suspiciously, sniffing at it. “This thing doesn’t have any milk in it, yeah?” He asks, side eyeing his host.

Mustang, who’s taken off the military blues and is sitting comfortably in an armchair with his own cup in hand, smirks. “Completely free of any evil dairy.” He confirms.

Edward gets the feeling that he’s being mocked but is too grateful for the drink to say anything. Instead he takes a huge gulp and gazes around the room speculatively.

The room looked homey enough, not as neat as he’d have expected, especially with all the books and paper lying around. There was a very fine layer of dust on the gramophone in the corner, and several half-empty cups were scattered throughout, despite that, or maybe because of that, it felt comfortable.

“So what sent you out in the uh- small hours of the morning?” Mustang asks, emphasizing the word small.

Ed’s anger, previously aimless, suddenly finds itself with a very convenient target.

He places the cup on the coffee table before exploding out, “ _Who are you calling small, you shitty bastard!”_ He shouts at his commanding officer and probably doing exactly what the older man wanted him to do.

“Really Fullmetal, for someone so small, you’ve got such a loud voice, you’ll wake the neighbors.” Mustang sighs as if the whole thing is but an inconvenience for him.

Ed’s blood boils. “ _You Bastard! -_ “he makes to jump off the couch only for his automail leg to freeze on him, and Edward is sent faceplanting into the carpet. On the plus side, the carpet is supremely comfortable.

“Shit! Fullmetal?” There’s a shuffling sound and suddenly the Colonel is kneeling besides him. “Are you alright?”

Edward groans, but stays down, stewing in his own humiliation.

“What’s wrong?” and there was genuine worry in the Colonel’s voice. That won’t do at all.

“Automail froze up.” He mutters into the carpet.

“Well then get closer to the fire, warm it up.”

At that Ed raises his head squirming around until his back is resting against the couch. “Not like that, sometimes it freezes up on its own, probably neurons misfiring or some shit. Sort of like how ,sometime, you miss a step and the like.” Ed offers when he sees Mustang’s brow twitching.

He hums in acknowledgment and says nothing back. Mustang returns back to his armchair.

“In all seriousness though, why were you wandering around in the middle of the night?” He then asks.

“Why were _you_ out in the middle of the night.” Ed shoots back.

“I had some papers to finish, Hawkeye would have been very cross if they weren’t done by tomorrow.” He says with a shiver.

And shit, Ed didn’t actually expect to get an answer, now he had to answer the bastard’s question, equivalent exchange. That bastard.

“Dead-end.” He mutters tonelessly, the disappointment obvious.

“Ah.” Roy says delicately. And who the fuck even says ‘Ah’ in real life? “So you decided freezing to death was the way to go?” He adds, the fucker.

Edward glares at him, golden eyes burning with the fire reflecting off them.

“Don’t even joke about that you bastard, I wanted to clear my head… had all these thoughts.” He adds the final part softly, unsure why he even said it.

At that Mustang seems to straighten in his seat. “What sort of thoughts, Edward?”

Ed’s running his hand over the carpet, lowkey marveling over how soft it is, so unlike the one in their dorms, he’d like a carpet like this one day.

The silence stretches.

“Do you know how easy it is to catch small-fry criminal?” Ed asks abruptly.

If Mustang’s thrown by the direction this conversation is taking, he’s not showing it.

“Very. I’d imagine.” He says.

“Yeah…” Edward hugs his legs to his chest, reveling in how warm his automail feels now.

“I keep thinking. The Philosopher stone, it’s human lives, right? I know that we said we won’t use it but- but! Sometimes I can’t help it! And the plan flows perfectly and it makes so much sense! Like what is the life of some asshole criminals against Al’s life? You know?” Ed says, his voice was steadily rising in pitch, words coming faster and fiercer.

Mustang in watching him. His eyes dark and lips pressed closed.

So Ed continuous on, now that he’s started it feels like a flood that won’t be stopped.

“I’d just catch some lowlifes, fifty-odd or so, and I already know the circles from Dr. Marco’s research, it would be so easy And Al would have his body back and the world would be rid of some assholes, so like it’s a win all around, right?” He asks Mustang as if imploring him to agree. He knows he looks desperate and half wild with the want, the night’s got a way with making everyone more honest.

“You know where that road leads Edward.” Mustang says honestly, no judgment in his voice. Not chiding either, only stating the truth.

“I _know_ ” The young man, boy really, wails hiding his face in his bent knees.

Mustang places his empty mug on the side table with a decisive clink, there is shuffling and Ed shifts his eye to watch him from under his fringe.

The man is leaning forward towards him, his expression unusually serious, and with fire making shadows dance across his face, he is oddly striking.

“Edward,” Ed finally registers the use of his name. “What you described is perfectly normal, it’s human nature to think about this, especially when you’re frustrated, and the fact that you’re not going through with this despite knowing how easy it would be, makes you an even better human than most.” Mustang says seriously, his dark eyes watching him like a hawk.

Ed’s throat suddenly feels tighter, he takes a deep shuddering breath and is lowkey pleased when his voice turns out normal enough. “Al would be so disappointed though.”

Mustang suddenly smiles, an honest smile, not one of the simpering one he gives his ladies, and the expression is so unusual that Ed finds himself staring, open-mouthed.

“What Al doesn’t know won’t hurt him, Ed. I found that living by this concept is very rewarding.” He simpers.

Edward finds himself snorting, imagining the amount of times The Colonel probably implemented the concept with Hawkeye in mind.

“In all seriousness though-“ He says, serious once more.”-imagining something and actually doing it, is a completely different thing Edward, And I know your moral code is too strong to actually go through with that plan.”

Ed’s cheeks _burn_.

“Whatever, old man.” He says averting his eyes and misses Mustang’s soft smile.

The conversation lulls and with the sound of the fire crackling in the background, it’s the best Edward’s felt all day.

Maybe it’s the warmth, maybe it’s the mysterious effect that the night’s got but Edward finds himself sharing more than he’d thought he’d ever share with anyone.

“I have a list you know.” He says and when Mustang looks at him in confusion he adds. “Circles that could bring Al back. A lot of them would work, I think…”

“but- but they’re, yanno, like, bad.” Edward says. Then stumbles over himself to explain. “exchanging my body and soul for Al’s body is one, another is binding his soul to another body, it won’t be his, but it would be _a_ body you know? Like, he’d actually get to like feel and sleep and eat and shit and he won’t have to spend all those nights _alone._ But I’d have to sacrifice another limb, -“Mustang’s eyes turns horrified”- not like I won’t gladly give up another leg!” he says as if _that_ was the problem. “- but Al would be upset! And who knows, maybe it will come to that, and then we’d have to find a viable body, which is shitty let me tell you- a-and like…” He trails off.

“It would feel like giving up.”

Mustang is silent.

“Sometimes I forget, how utterly brilliant you are.” He says, voice turning off at the end.

“W-what?” Ed splutters.

Mustang lets out an amused huff.

“Your loyalty and dedication would put anyone to shame, Edward, the lengths you’re willing to go for your brother are astounding.” He says.

And Ed is- he honestly has no idea what to think.

“Shut up bastard! it’s what any big brother would do.” He says defensively.

Mustang’s lip twitches.

“It really, really isn’t.”

“It was my fault. “He insists, “So now it’s my responsibility to see this through, Al’s perfect, he deserves the best in life.”

Mustang opens his mouth to say something then closes it, as if quickly changing his mind. “And I’m not saying he doesn’t, I’m just pointing out that many people would have given up by now. But you, despite all this- “he says, arm encompassing his everything”- you’re still fighting, and its admirable.”

Edward wrinkles his nose. “Stop with the compliments, its seriously creepy.” He says, ignoring the Colonel’s previous statement.

Mustang huffs.

And Ed. Well, his shoulders have been slowly loosening all through their conversation, and even though the Colonel didn’t really offer any pieces of wisdom, the – say validation if you will, was comforting.

The fire crackles.

“Thanks.” He says softly to his knees.

There is silence and Ed is afraid that The Colonel haven’t heard and Ed would have to repeat the sentiment louder.

He hears shuffling and a gentle hand touches the top of his head, “You’re welcome, Edward. Now, come, it’s already late enough and some of us have work in the morning.”

Normally Ed would take the chance to insult The Colonel and his dubious work ethics- but, well, night makes strangers of us all.

He rises to his feet and follows the Colonel to bed.

__

Morning comes with a note on the kitchen table and a covered plate of breakfast and Ed is again struck with how lovely it was, the feeling of home.

The note, telling him the Colonel is off to work and to lock the door behind him if he decides to leave, and oh to eat breakfast, as if Ed needed someone to remind him of that.

The food is surprisingly good, even if its cold. And with nothing else to do, Ed makes his way back to the dorms, slightly guilty that he stayed out the whole night without telling Al first.

The first thing that greats him when he opens the door is a loud teary “Brother!”

The second thing he knows he’s being strangled in a bone cracking hug. He squawks and squirms “Al, shit, AL Your spike!” He screeches at his brother.

Only for Al to completely ignore him, rubbing his metal face to his brother’s “-And I didn’t know where you went, a-and I thought you’d gone to do something- “he breaks off and Ed is instantly flooded with guilt.

He stops squirming, giving in to his fate, hanging off his brother’s strong body, feet barely skimming the ground.

“Shit, I’m sorry Al, I didn’t think- and I ran into the Colonel and we got talking- “

“The Colonel?” Al cuts him off, his voice turning weird.

“Yeah? “Ed says uncertainly.

“And what did you do with the Colonel, brother?” Al asks again with that super calm voice.

Ed frowns. “Uh? Nothing? We just talked, and it was too late to walk back so he offered to let me stay the night.”

“hmm” Al hums.

“Hmm? What hmm? What does that mean? Hey Al- AL!”

“Nothing, brother, I’m just glad you’re alright, honest!” He says innocently enough, but Ed knew that brat long enough to know that he’s a dirty lying liar who lies.

Ed eyes him suspiciously, while Al does a brilliant impression of innocence and given that he’s an 8-foot-tall suit of armor it was impressive indeed.

“whatever, I don’t believe you anyway.”

“Always so suspicious brother, you’re getting paranoid.” And before Ed could blow out at him about how _so not paranoid_ he was, Al adds “Did you have breakfast brother?”

Anger derailed, he says “Uh, yeah, The Colonel made me food before he went to work.”

“hmm.” Al hums again.

“Hey! What does that even mean?” he screeches again, pointing at his brother an accusing finger.

“Nothing for you to worry about brother.” Al says pleasantly.

An aggravated shout could be heard throughout the compound, and all was well with the world.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! it's been ages since i posted anything! almost a year, damn! Nothing like upcoming finals to motivate you though!  
> Here's a little something that wouldn't leave me alone, hope you enjoyed it! and thank you for reading this far!  
> (You can totally come fangirl with me about those adorable potatoes on my tumblr http://sevansarr.tumblr.com/ )  
> -Sevansa


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